Chapter 24

AN ARRIVAL--AN ELECTION--ARCHITECTURE--A ROLLING-PIN, AND PATRIOTISM
OF THE MOST APPROVED WATER.

In due time the coast of Leaplow made its appearance, close under
our larboard bow. So sudden was our arrival in this novel and
extraordinary country, that we were very near running on it, before
we got a glimpse of its shores. The seamanship of Captain Poke,
however, stood us in hand; and, by the aid of a very clever pilot,
we were soon safely moored in the harbor of Bivouac. In this happy
land, there was no registration, no passports, "no nothin'"--as Mr.
Poke pointedly expressed it. The formalities were soon observed,
although I had occasion to remark, how much easier, after all, it is
to get along in this world with vice than with virtue. A bribe
offered to a custom-house officer was refused; and the only trouble
I had, on the occasion, arose from this awkward obtrusion of a
conscience. However, the difficulty was overcome, though not quite
as easily as if douceurs had happened to be in fashion; and we were
permitted to land with all our necessary effects.

The city of Bivouac presented a singular aspect as I first put foot
within its hallowed streets. The houses were all covered with large
placards, which, at first, I took to be lists of the wares to be
vended, for the place is notoriously commercial; but which, on
examination, I soon discovered were merely electioneering handbills.
The reader will figure to himself my pleasure and surprise, on
reading the first that offered. It ran as follows:

"HORIZONTAL NOMINATION.

"Horizontal-Systematic-Indoctrinated-Republicans: Attention!

"Your sacred rights are in danger; your dearest liberties are
menaced; your wives and children are on the point of dissolution;
the infamous and unconstitutional position that the sun gives light
by day, and the moon by night, is openly and impudently propagated,
and now is the only occasion that will probably ever offer to arrest
an error so pregnant with deception and domestic evils. We present
to your notice a suitable defender of all those near and dear
interests, in the person of"

"JOHN GOLDENCALF,"

"the known patriot, the approved legislator, the profound
philosopher, the incorruptible statesman. To our adopted fellow-
citizens we need not recommend Mr. Goldencalf, for he is truly one
of themselves; to the native citizens we will only say, 'Try him,
and you will be more than satisfied.'"

I found this placard of great use, for it gave me the first
information I had yet had of the duty I was expected to perform in
the coming session of the great council; which was merely to
demonstrate that the moon gave light by day, and that