Chapter 3 - Page 2

dear, because we was friends like, and she'd her troubles the same as me,
but I ain't going to stand it from him. That I'll let him know fast
enough; and now she's dead he can take himself off, and good riddance.
But how're _you_ going to live--begging about the street? A big girl
like you--I'm ashamed of such goings on, and ain't going to have it in my
house."

Fan shook her head: the slow tears were beginning to fall now. "I'd do
anything for mother," she said, with a half sob, "but she's dead, and
I'll never beg more."

"That's a good girl, Fan. But you always was a good girl, I must say,
only they didn't do what's right by you. Now don't cry, poor dear, but
run up to your room and lie down; you're dead tired."

"I can't go there any more," murmured Fan, in a kind of despairing way.

"And what are you going to do? He'll do nothing for you, but 'll only
make you beg and abuse you. I know Joe Harrod, and only wish he'd got his
head broke instead of poor Margy. Ain't you got no relation you know of
to go to? She was country-bred, Margy was; she come from Norfolk, I often
heard her say."

"I've got no one," murmured Fan.

"Well, don't cry no more. Come in here; you look starved and tired to
death. When my man comes in you'll have tea with us, and I'll let you
sleep in my room. But, Fan, if Joe won't keep you and goes off and leaves
you, you'll have to go into the House, because _I_ couldn't keep
you, if I wanted ever so."

Fan followed her into her room on the ground-floor: there was a fire in
the grate, which threw a dim flickering light on the dusty-looking walls
and ceiling and the old shabby furniture, but it was very superior to the
Harrods' bare apartment, and to the poor girl it seemed a perfect haven
of rest. Retreating to a corner she sat down, and began slowly pondering
over the words the landlady had spoken. The "House" she had always been
taught to look on as a kind of prison where those who were unfit to live,
and could not live, and yet would not die, were put away out of sight.
For those who went to gaol for doing wrong there was hope; not so for the
penniless, friendless incapables who drifted or were dragged into the
dreary refuge of the "House." They might come out again when the weather
was warm, and try to renew the struggle in which they had suffered
defeat; but their case would be then like that of the fighter who has
been felled to the earth, and staggers up, half stunned and blinded with
blood, to renew the combat with an uninjured opponent. And yet the words
she had heard, while persistently remaining in her mind, did not impress
her very much then. She was tired and