Chapter 55

CHAPTER LV
Mr. SOLOMON PELL, ASSISTED BY A SELECT COMMITTEE
OF COACHMEN, ARRANGES THE AFFAIRS OF THE ELDER
Mr. WELLER

'Samivel,' said Mr. Weller, accosting his son on the morning after
the funeral, 'I've found it, Sammy. I thought it wos there.'

'Thought wot wos there?' inquired Sam.

'Your mother-in-law's vill, Sammy,' replied Mr. Weller. 'In
wirtue o' vich, them arrangements is to be made as I told you on,
last night, respectin' the funs.'

'Wot, didn't she tell you were it wos?' inquired Sam.

'Not a bit on it, Sammy,' replied Mr. Weller. 'We wos
a adjestin' our little differences, and I wos a-cheerin' her spirits
and bearin' her up, so that I forgot to ask anythin' about it. I
don't know as I should ha' done it, indeed, if I had remembered
it,' added Mr. Weller, 'for it's a rum sort o' thing, Sammy, to go
a-hankerin' arter anybody's property, ven you're assistin' 'em in
illness. It's like helping an outside passenger up, ven he's been
pitched off a coach, and puttin' your hand in his pocket, vile you
ask him, vith a sigh, how he finds his-self, Sammy.'

With this figurative illustration of his meaning, Mr. Weller
unclasped his pocket-book, and drew forth a dirty sheet of
letter-paper, on which were inscribed various characters crowded
together in remarkable confusion.

'This here is the dockyment, Sammy,' said Mr. Weller. 'I found
it in the little black tea-pot, on the top shelf o' the bar closet.
She used to keep bank-notes there, 'fore she vos married,
Samivel. I've seen her take the lid off, to pay a bill, many and
many a time. Poor creetur, she might ha' filled all the tea-pots in
the house vith vills, and not have inconwenienced herself neither,
for she took wery little of anythin' in that vay lately, 'cept on the
temperance nights, ven they just laid a foundation o' tea to put
the spirits atop on!'

'What does it say?' inquired Sam.

'Jist vot I told you, my boy,' rejoined his parent. 'Two hundred
pound vurth o' reduced counsels to my son-in-law, Samivel, and
all the rest o' my property, of ev'ry kind and description votsoever,
to my husband, Mr. Tony Veller, who I appint as my sole eggzekiter.'

'That's all, is it?' said Sam.

'That's all,' replied Mr. Weller. 'And I s'pose as it's all right
and satisfactory to you and me as is the only parties interested,
ve may as vell put this bit o' paper into the fire.'

'Wot are you a-doin' on, you lunatic?' said Sam, snatching the
paper away, as his parent, in all innocence, stirred the fire
preparatory to suiting the action to the word. 'You're a nice
eggzekiter, you are.'

'Vy not?' inquired Mr. Weller, looking sternly round, with the
poker in his hand.