Act I - Page 2

terms. As ever, yours sincerely." [His agitation
masters him again] Thats a nice slap in the face to get from a man
in his position! This is what your son has brought on me.

MRS GILBEY. Well, I think it's rather a nice letter. He as good as
tells you hes only letting on to be offended for Bobby's good.

GILBEY. Oh, very well: have the letter framed and hang it up over
the mantelpiece as a testimonial.

MRS GILBEY. Dont talk nonsense, Rob. You ought to be thankful to
know that the boy is alive after his disappearing like that for nearly
a week.

GILBEY. Nearly a week! A fortnight, you mean. Wheres your feelings,
woman? It was fourteen days yesterday.

MRS GILBEY. Oh, dont call it fourteen days, Rob, as if the boy was in
prison.

GILBEY. How do you know hes not in prison? It's got on my nerves so,
that I'd believe even that.

MRS GILBEY. Dont talk silly, Rob. Bobby might get into a scrape like
any other lad; but he'd never do anything low.

_Juggins, the footman, comes in with a card on a salver. He is a
rather low-spirited man of thirty-five or more, of good appearance and
address, and iron self-command._

JUGGINS. [presenting the salver to Mr Gilbey] Lady wishes to see
Mr Bobby's parents, sir.

GILBEY. [pointing to Mrs Gilbey] Theres Mr Bobby's parent. I
disown him.

JUGGINS. Yes, sir. [He presents the salver to Mrs Gilbey].

MRS GILBEY. You mustnt mind what your master says, Juggins: he
doesnt mean it. [She takes the card and reads it]. Well, I never!

GILBEY. Whats up now?

MRS GILBEY. [reading] "Miss D. Delaney. Darling Dora." Just like
that--in brackets. What sort of person, Juggins?

GILBEY. Whats her address?

MRS GILBEY. The West Circular Road. Is that a respectable address,
Juggins?

JUGGINS. A great many most respectable people live in the West
Circular Road, madam; but the address is not a guarantee of
respectability.

GILBEY. So it's come to that with him, has it?

MRS GILBEY. Dont jump to conclusions, Rob. How do you know? [To
Juggins] Is she a lady, Juggins? You know what I mean.

JUGGINS. In the sense in which you are using the word, no, madam.

MRS GILBEY. I'd better try what I can get out of her. [To Juggins]
Shew her up. You dont mind, do you, Rob?

GILBEY. So long as you dont flounce out and leave me alone with her.
[He rises and plants himself on the hearth-rug].

_Juggins goes out._

MRS GILBEY. I wonder what she wants, Rob?

GILBEY. If she wants money, she shant have it. Not a farthing. A
nice thing, everybody seeing her on our doorstep! If it wasnt that
she may tell us something about the lad, I'd have Juggins put the