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    "There are two tragedies in life. One is not to get your heart's desire. The other is to get it."
     

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    Chapter 4 - Page 2

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    Yet why not some other Power
    As great might have aspired, and me, though mean,
    Drawn to his part; but other Powers as great
    Fell not, but stand unshaken, from within
    Or from without, to all temptations armed.
    Hadst thou the same free will and power to stand?
    Thou hadst: whom hast thou then or what to accuse,
    But Heaven's free love dealt equally to all?
    Be then his love accursed, since love or hate,
    To me alike, it deals eternal woe.
    Nay, cursed be thou; since against his thy will
    Chose freely what it now so justly rues.
    Me miserable! which way shall I fly
    Infinite wrath, and infinite despair?
    Which way I fly is Hell; myself am Hell;
    And, in the lowest deep, a lower deep
    Still threatening to devour me opens wide,
    To which the Hell I suffer seems a Heaven.
    O, then, at last relent: Is there no place
    Left for repentance, none for pardon left?
    None left but by submission; and that word
    Disdain forbids me, and my dread of shame
    Among the Spirits beneath, whom I seduced
    With other promises and other vaunts
    Than to submit, boasting I could subdue
    The Omnipotent. Ay me! they little know
    How dearly I abide that boast so vain,
    Under what torments inwardly I groan,
    While they adore me on the throne of Hell.
    With diadem and scepter high advanced,
    The lower still I fall, only supreme
    In misery: Such joy ambition finds.
    But say I could repent, and could obtain,
    By act of grace, my former state; how soon
    Would highth recall high thoughts, how soon unsay
    What feigned submission swore? Ease would recant
    Vows made in pain, as violent and void.
    For never can true reconcilement grow,
    Where wounds of deadly hate have pierced so deep:
    Which would but lead me to a worse relapse
    And heavier fall: so should I purchase dear
    Short intermission bought with double smart.
    This knows my Punisher; therefore as far
    From granting he, as I from begging, peace;
    All hope excluded thus, behold, in stead
    Mankind created, and for him this world.
    So farewell, hope; and with hope farewell, fear;
    Farewell, remorse! all good to me is lost;
    Evil, be thou my good; by thee at least
    Divided empire with Heaven's King I hold,
    By thee, and more than half perhaps will reign;

    As Man ere long, and this new world, shall know.
    Thus while he spake, each passion dimmed his face
    Thrice changed with pale, ire, envy, and despair;
    Which marred his borrowed visage, and betrayed
    Him counterfeit, if any eye beheld.
    For heavenly minds from such distempers foul
    Are ever clear. Whereof he soon aware,
    Each perturbation smoothed with outward calm,
    Artificer of fraud; and was the first
    That practised falsehood under saintly show,
    Deep malice to conceal,
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