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    "Just because something doesn't do what you planned it to do doesn't mean it's useless."

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    Robert Benchley Quotes

    American actor, author, & humorist

    Quotes by Robert Benchley

    • A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.
    • An ardent supporter of the hometown team should go to a game prepared to take offense, no matter what happens.
    • Anyone can do any amount of work provided it isn't the work he is supposed to be doing at the moment.
    • As for me, except for an occasional heart attack, I feel as young as I ever did.
    • Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.
    • Drawing on my fine command of the English language, I said nothing.
    • Drinking makes such fools of people, and people are such fools to begin with, that it's compounding a felony.
    • I can't bring myself to say, 'Well, I guess I'll be toddling along.' It isn't that I can't toddle. It's just that I can't guess I'll toddle.
    • It took me fifteen years to discover that I had no talent for writing, but I couldn't give it up because by that time I was too famous.
    • The surest way to make a monkey of a man is to quote him.
    • There are two kinds of people in the world, those who believe there are two kinds of people in the world and those who don't.
      Benchley's Law of Distinction
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